my mom kicked me out for her new family then demanded College money for my siblings when she found out I’m successful to put things in perspective my mother gave birth to me at the age of 20 and my biological father was never involved he never wanted children she told me and because they had only been dating for a few months when she became pregnant she offered him the option to leave which he did she stated that because of the bitterness of their breakup she had chosen not to demand child support from him and he had also

refused to pay never talking again was convenient for both both of them she was fortunate to have my grandparents unwavering support and encouragement which enabled her to finish her schooling and secure employment she dated a couple men while I was younger and she began dating Harry A co-worker when I was about 8 years old before getting married they dated for over 3 years although we weren’t very close Harry and I got along well enough to put up with each other being in the house when my mom became pregnant 4 years

after they were married everyone was overjoyed including me in retrospect I probably should have known what was going to happen but I was too preoccupied with the idea that my mother would always support me I hoped mom wouldn’t leave me now because she had endured a lot of challenges Raising Me by herself she obviously distanced herself from me after she married Harry and we began to drift apart but I thought it was only a phase and that things would improve during her pregnancy I did my best to be encouraging but she appeared to get

angrier every time I was there to avoid disturbing her I made the decision to become scarce but it seems that I wasn’t inconspicuous ous enough she and Harry sat me down for a serious conversation 6 months after she gave birth to twins they informed me that they couldn’t keep me in the house since they had two children to look after they couldn’t legally throw me out without getting in trouble because I was still a juvenile having just turned 16 by highlighting the financial burden of providing for a big family on their meager income they

attempted to persuade me otherwise since we had been living comfortably up until that point I honestly didn’t think it was hard to maintain two adults one teenager and two kids on the salary of Two web Engineers they clearly only wanted me gone I genuinely didn’t want to leave so even at that point I attempted to offer ways to stop it if money was a problem I offered to acquire a job but my mother said she wanted to save money and resources for the children who deserved it more she stated that the asterisk deserved asterisk to

stay with them more than I did not that the asterisk needed asterisk this more that was all it took for me to decide that I had to leave because it was obvious that no one wanted me they knew I had enough dignity to know I was unwanted so they had only nudged me in the right way after I left without even telling me where I should go their strategy was successful since they hadn’t really evicted me it wasn’t technically an eviction but I would still consider it to be the same I felt like I had no other choice after they

had forced me into a difficult situation I went straight to my grandparents house when I left that day they wanted to be there for the twins so even though they were upset about what my mother had done they didn’t cut her off at 16 I obtained part-time work because I could no longer financially rely on my grandparents due to their Advanced age when my mom and Harry went to visit my grandparents with the kids I would see them every now and then but they seldom ever inquired about me they tended to be very formal as if

they didn’t miss me at all even when they did see me they actually appeared to be happy without my presence I was saddened by my mother’s apparent decrease in irritability but I knew there was nothing I could do about it until it was time to go to college I lived with my grandparents my mom wasn’t involved with me even then so I had to rely on friends to assist me get settled in my dorm because my grandparents weren’t old enough or healthy enough my mom and Harry declined preferring to preserve money for the twins future so I

had to take out a student loan and one of my relatives co-signed for it fortunately one of my uncles agreed to assist if I assured him that he would never be responsible for any of the costs I worked while I was in college to make sure I wouldn’t fall behind on my payments and to give myself a financial advantage my mother and I hardly spoke once I started college and only my grandparents were present when I graduated not even my mother bothered to congratulate me in order to avoid being a burden to my elderly grandparents I

began working and lived independently after college although I didn’t make much money during the first few years I was still able to pay for groceries utilities rent and even started to pay off my debt while setting money up for the future in fact I would describe asterisk that asterisk as living on a limited income fortunately things finally got better it took a while but I eventually Rose through the ranks of my organization considering that I received very little assistance I’m proud of how far I’ve gone and am now in a rather

comfortable posture unexpectedly my mother discovered that I earn a good living even though we haven’t spoken for many years at nearly 33 I currently hold a Senior Management role at the same organization where I began my career about four months ago I got a big promotion but I wanted to keep it a secret so only a select few individuals knew about it to thank my uncle for co-signing my loan back when I was having trouble paying for college I did inform him according to what I understand he just met my mom and Harry

at a family get together and urged her to get in touch with me to congratulate me on my success even though I’m sure he meant well it didn’t work out because she didn’t even get in touch with me to offer me congratulations in the end my mother learned about it and recently visited my home with Harry insisting on talking to me I should note that I haven’t spoken to her since I started college I blocked her everywhere and left her out of my life after graduating since I didn’t think there was any use in hoping she

would change her mind she didn’t appear to be negatively impacted and to be honest I doubt she even noticed only my grandparents who were aware that I disliked discussing my mother were in contact with me and they steered clear of the subject I didn’t really stay in touch with my uncle either so I was unaware that my mom and Harry had been having financial difficulties for a few years only when they arrived at my door and told me how bad things had gotten did I find out it was wishful thinking but the only reason I even allowed them

inside was because I hoped they would be coming to make amends they began by stating that they had heard from my uncle about my promotion and how I was one of the youngest individuals in such a prominent position in my firm rather than congratulating me on my accomplishment it seems that they were surprised that I had kept it from them ironically I was taken aback that they expected me to communicate with them at all much less deliver any positive news additionally they were disappointed that I had shut them out of my life claiming

that it was only because they had prioritized their children above me they maintained that I should have been old enough to comprehend their rearranged priorities and not Harbor resentment as a teenager they said that I should have supported their decisions rather than going in with my grandparents I’m not even sure why they thought I would agree with their choice to expel me from the house they tried to Gaslight me into thinking that I was the bad guy for being angry that they had ejected me so they could spend time with their

children alone but that’s how they began our reunion after all these years they talked about how tough the past several years had been for them without even giving me a chance to expl explain my side of the story they described how they had launched their own company but regrettably it did not succeed resulting in losses they were now attempting to make up for previous losses and they desperately needed money as the Twins were getting close to college age I saw then why they had come they needed financial assistance they didn’t waste

any time going right to the point even trying to soften it by claiming that I could make it up to them by paying for my siblings schooling but that at first they were upset that I hadn’t contacted them despite performing well their attempt to make it seem as though they were doing aerisk me asterisk a favor by allowing me to pay for the college education of two children I no longer knew astounded me I told them right away that I wouldn’t be doing that and that it was disrespectful of them to believe they could coerce me into doing

so I became irate and reminded them that they were the reason I had to work during my college Years and pay for my own education because they wanted to save for their real children who they believed deserved it more than I did they had refused to provide me with financial support back then I assured them that they had no right to expect anything from me now particularly financial support since I had never questioned their choice to put the twins first and had just left them alone they actually no longer had the right to

demand that I communicate with them instead of attempting to emotionally control me I pointed out that they could now use the same money to pay for the twins College bills because they had wished to conserve money and resources for the children who deserved it I had nothing else to say so I asked them to go I was stupid to invite them inside my house in the first place assuming might have come to express regret for their treatment of me they became irritated and attempted to place the blame elsewhere when I began to insist that

they leave they informed me that I wasn’t innocent in this case their protection they said I was overenthusiastic over involved and frequently irritable while we all live together I was only a teenager trying to keep in touch with my family as they drifted away from me so I couldn’t believe that was a true issue they had with me they then had the audacity to claim that I was no better than them since I had denied their request they said I was forgetting all the years my mother had taken care of me and brought

me up alone they said that this was my opportunity to make it up to her and a sister but I was being rude and unappreciative instead since I was a child at the time I thought it was absurd that they would bring that up even if I had wanted to I couldn’t have decided not to rely on them furthermore it wasn’t like they were helping me they pushed me out of the house and effectively forced me out as soon as they believed I was mature enough to manage things on my own for the following 18 years they refused to acknowledge my existence I was still

shocked that they had the gall to expect me to Aid them now as if I owed them something even after everything that had happened during the dispute things became quite personal and ugly and I finally threatened to call the police if they didn’t leave my property my mother reminded me of all the sacrifices she had made when I was younger ostensibly because she wanted to be a good mother before they finally departed after more arguments she said that I had been ungrateful the one time she had expected me to sympathize with her predicament

and allow to put other people before myself she now claimed that rather than the other way around I was portraying her as the villain since then this has been bothering me and I’m having trouble figuring out whether I’m to blame whether I’ve been expecting too much from my mother or whether she’s simply deceiving me I decided to post on Reddit to get some unbiased perspectives even though I’m quite sure I’m correct aita for not paying for my half siblings College tuition just because my stepdad and aranged mother are having financial

difficulties edit even though my uncle uncle had excellent intentions I reminded him that what he did was wrong and unacceptable his actions undoubtedly had a negative effect I wouldn’t be in this predicament if he hadn’t shared my life with my mother and disclosed my contact details without my consent he apologized excessively stating that he was unaware of their financial difficulties and that he had no idea my mother would respond in this manner he admitted that he had no business telling my mother about my life and that if we

had wanted to get back together we would have done so without his help since his heart was in the right place I don’t intend to cut him out of my life I would have been much more Angry if he had meant something different he simply made an error in addition it was because of him that I was initially able to attend college he was the only person who was prepared to assume the responsibility of co-signing my loan application if you consider it I might not be in this situation at all if it weren’t for him I made sure to let him know that what he

did wasn’t appropriate since I don’t want to come across as unappreciative but I’m also not a doormat whatever I did was fair enough and I believe I found the Ideal Balance we’re doing great together and I won’t hold anything against him because I needed this resolution somehow I also discussed my mom’s recent struggles with my grandparents they believe I’m correct and have promised to make an effort to persuade her to change her mind I realized that they didn’t want to lose touch with their other grandchildren

which is why they have remained in touch with my mom they understand the struggles my mom’s family is going through but they don’t think it’s right or fair to put me through this that’s their position on the issue and I believe believe it’s reasonable enough asterisk asterisk first update my mother has taken it upon herself to remind me of all she did for me growing up ever since we last spoke which was nearly 9 days ago she probably sends me an email every other day to make me feel like I owe her something it’s not like she gave me a favor by

raising me alone and she was legally required to take care of me so I don’t really understand the point she only reared me when it was convenient for her she and her spouse decided to expel me as as soon as I started to cause them trouble citing the need to save money for the twins in their future now that we’re in the future and the twins are adults I believe they should rely on themselves rather than wasting time trying to manipulate and guilt trip me although I had been ignoring her emails I made the decision to reply a few days

ago I explained to her all I had written in my essay she didn’t take it well as expected and labeled me ungrateful once more I just informed her that calling me names would not alter the truth and that I no longer wanted to have any contact with her because she had been a bad mother I blocked her email account after that but she made a new one to continue to annoy me since she never done the same for me I block that one as well and I’ll keep doing so until she understands that I’m not here to mope about her to

be honest I’m glad we’re finally having this discussion because I think it will end quickly and I’ll have the necessary closure only because I was still clinging to the hope that perhaps they had changed that perhaps they were here to congratulate me and make amends did I welcome them into my house and talk to them that day however speaking with them made me realize that they are just not the type of individuals who are able to experience regret guilt or shame I fully given up on ever making amends with them

after it one again made me realize how self-centered and cunning they are second update I believe that my mother’s appearance at my place of employment earlier today was the most bizarre thing she has ever done fortunately I wasn’t working today so she departed really fast and didn’t succeed in her Endeavor I was feeling a little under the weather so I decided to take the day off and I’m so happy I did she would have definitely thrown a fit or done anything to make me look foolish if I’d been present when the receptionist called to informed me

that my mom had arrived wanting to see me and refusing to go despite being informed that I wasn’t there I learned the truth when they put her on the phone with me I firmly told her that I was at home even though I was already rather anxious about what she might do she was informed that if she attempted anything at my place of employment I would sue her until she would be too ashamed to send her children to college I did my best to sound threatening so I believe it truly frightened her she agreed to depart right away provided I met her in

person so it must have worked I reminded her that she couldn’t afford a lawsuit at the moment and informed her that she wasn’t in a position to be making demands I also mentioned that my employer would not think twice about suing her if the situation worsened which would be a very different scenario because they wouldn’t be as forgiving as I’d been she’d be better off just going out in silence I didn’t get any more calls or notifications regarding the event so I guess she left after giving the the phone back to the receptionist I

can’t afford for this to happen again because that was undoubtedly a near call I’ve made the decision to speak with a lawyer to find out what precautions I may take she hasn’t threatened me directly so I’m not sure if this is enough to get a restraining order but I still want to speak with the attorney to discuss my Alternatives I just have to hope that this experience was unpleasant enough for her to think about leaving me alone till then update 3 since I’m very certain we now have grounds for a restraining order I suppose I don’t need

to consider filing one when my mother arrived at my place of employment last week I was able to persuade her to leave however in light of this week’s events I believe that a restraining order against her needs to be issued for everyone she was waiting outside my door when I got home from work a few days ago I informed her right away that I didn’t want to argue and that I would call the police if she didn’t leave she practically raced at me and threw me to the ground sending my phone flying out of my hands as I was ready to dial she cursed at me

and blamed me for everything that had gone wrong in her life while she attempted to beat me up it took me a while to react since I was so taken aback by her insane conduct however because I consistently work out and am much younger than her it was simple for me to overwhelm her when I did fortunately all the shouting had alerted my neighbors to the problem and caused them to call the police they even came to my Aid and restrained my mother as we awaited the arrival of the cops I made the decision to file charges when the

police eventually arrived she is currently in a lot of trouble in addition addition I’ve discussed this with my attorney and requested a restraining order against her I’ve been informed that Harry has taken the children and moved in with his parents I’m not sure if he intends to come back anytime soon he apparently challenged her about her behavior after saving her and informed her that she couldn’t continue acting in this manner she also got into a fight with him which seems to mean she’s really lost it I believe she

finds it difficult to believe that I’m doing well in life but in all honesty she is to blame for her own issues I will not be sorry for her her I’ll have the restraining order in place soon and since I’m making more money I’ve already started thinking about moving into a larger home since now seems like the ideal moment I’m going to start exploring my Alternatives being linked to someone like that is embarrassing so I sincerely hope my mother receives the support she needs and learns to behave normally she has also been nasty to my

grandparents who have told me they no longer want to be around her the only person she can blame for everyone avoiding her is herself anyway I’m not worried about it anymore more.