parents chose my sister’s housewarming party over my wedding because I refused to invite her after she punched me now my grandparents are walking me down the a instead for a very long time I have always known that my parents loved my older sister Vicki more than me she was the planned child while I was the result of an accidental pregnancy just 10 months later they probably didn’t even want me but decided to keep the pregnancy anyway my mother’s parents had passed away before I was even born but my dad’s parents were very much alive so

they took on a significant role in my upbringing Grandma and Grandpa were the in my life providing the love and support that I often felt lacking for my own parents I remember so many instances when my parents would leave me behind with my grandparents and only take my sister for trips when I was young I didn’t mind because it was fun living with my grandparents but as I started to grow up like when I was 6 or 7 years old I realized just how unfair this was but my problem wasn’t just with my parents it was also with my sister Vicki while I

harbored no ill will toward Vicki I couldn’t help but feel like an unwanted addition to the family she knew that as well and made me feel like a stranger every day in my own home she would always compete with me for everything be it about grades attention from our parents or even the smallest accomplishments it felt like a constant battle for validation and I was always on the losing end because my parents preferred her always as a result I would feel really inferior and we never quite saw eye to eye our relationship seemed

more like a Perpetual contest with her consistently coming out on top on one occasion she wanted to be friends with a group of girls but because she was nerdy she was afraid to approach them one of the girls and I had art classes today so she introduced me to to the rest of the group and we all would hang out together Vicki was so jealous of this that she made my parents talk to me about including her also whenever I was hanging out with them I tried to fight but my mother called me selfish while my dad said she was my sister and I should

look after her begrudgingly I agreed and introduced Vicki to the rest of the girls now Vicki doesn’t really have a lot of friends so she can come off as over enthusiastic so she would constantly try to impress the girls in our group often coming across as intrusive despite her efforts she struggled to find her place among them and the awkward tension between Vicki and the other girls was always palpable for example one of the girls had a crush on a guy so Vicki took it upon herself to approach the guy and let him know

that the girl liked him he laughed because he was not interested in when and told everyone about it which embarrassed the girl after this the girls told me very firmly that they didn’t want me to bring Vicki with me to our hangout so I agreed however Vicki wasn’t having it she threw a tantrum when she found out that the girls wanted nothing to do with her and went to our parents insisting that I should not hang out with these mean girls either since I was her sister and I should stand up for her I refused and told her that it was

her own fault that they didn’t want to be friends with her but my parents as usual supported her they lectured me about how Vicki had no ill intentions and that I should try to convince the girls to forgive Vicky but that if they didn’t then I should cut them off also I refused and put my foot down I liked hanging out with them and unlike Vicki I wasn’t going to jeopardize my friendship in any way I told my parents that I had enough and it wasn’t up to me to find friends for Vicki my parents were pissed and gave me the silent treatment for

weeks but I’m glad I stuck to my guns this group of girls has continued to be my friends till today and are basically like my sisters I I have cried with them laughed with them and shared some of the most meaningful moments of my life however at that time it was really hard for me to stand firm in my decision there were moments when doubt crept in when I questioned whether I had made the right choice in prioritizing my own happiness over what they wanted this was not the only reason Vicki grew to hate me there was also another incident of a

boy she had a crush on a guy and I had no idea about him he and I would sit together for some classes because we were friends he tried to ask me out for junior prom but I declined politely since I was already going with someone I liked later when Vicki found out she made a hue and cry about it telling my parents how I always take things she wants and that I was knowingly flirting with a guy for months she called me a bunch of nasty Words which no one should say to their own sister and told my parents how she wished I was not her

sister my mother sided with her telling me how it was wrong of me and that as a sister I should respect girls code I tried telling them that I wasn’t even interested in the guy and had declined his invitation so she was free to ask him if she wanted but Vicki refused to let it go looking back I think she knew the guy would have rejected her anyway so she just wanted to take her frustration out on me since he asked me instead of her once my dad took me out for ice cream telling me that he wanted to spend some father/daughter time with

me now this never happened so I was really pleased however he started asking me a bunch of questions like if me and my boyfriend were being careful if my boyfriend came from a good family or if my boyfriend and I ever did drugs I was taken aback by his line of questioning and asked him what he meant by all this this is when my dad revealed that Vicki had been making up stories and telling my parents for months that I was doing drugs and drinking alcohol with my boyfriend this was a complete lie and I showed my dad my my phone for him to

verify that Vicki was lying later when my dad confronted her about all the lies she tried to justify that no one our age just hangs out with a guy and that I was hiding things from everyone I was so pissed that I yelled at her for trying to make unnecessary drama and told her that it wasn’t my fault that she had no one to date but that she needed to keep her nose out of my business Vicki didn’t like it and punched me this happened out of nowhere since he had never been physically violent before my nose started bleeding as I fell down on the

ground clutching my face in pain my parents rushed me to the emergency room and all the while they were pleading with me to not file a police complaint against Vicki they kept saying how it would ruin her life while I was sitting in the backseat clutching my face Vicki didn’t even care nor did she apologize later when the nurse asked me about the incident I told her the truth and she called CPS my parents were furious with me for involving CPS viewing it as a betrayal of family loyalty in their eyes Vicky’s actions were dismissed as a mere

accident an isolated incident that should not warrant such drastic intervention they pleaded with the authorities insisting that Vicki was not a danger to me and that her actions were out of character in the end Vicki was let go but they warned my parents that they would keep a close eye on our situation in case any other accidents happen with me as you can imagine Vicki was really shaken up and so were my parents later my parents told me that they were disappointed in me for trying to ruin my sister’s life my mother

started to cry and told me how I was tearing the family apart by involving Outsiders my father’s disappointment was palpable his words heavy with reproach as he questioned my decision to escalate the situation I told them firmly that I wanted Vicki out of my life and they agreed I did feel guilty involving the authorities but for the first time I felt safer at my own house once Vicki had been formally warned my parents had a separate conversation with her and since that day she stopped talking to me altogether I very much preferred this

over her constantly hovering around me or trying to insert herself into my life when my grandparents found out about this incident they asked me to pack my bag so I could live with them for the remainder of high school they informed my parents who did not protest much so I left to live with my grandparents unlike my parents place I felt safe and loved here the remaining days of high school went well and I made lasting memories with my friends my parents never once visited me or called me throughout all that time I knew they were happy with

their beloved daughter so I never tried to contact them even though it hurt me that they could so easily discard me like I was nothing when I was graduating high school my parents only showed up to cheer for Vicki they didn’t even congratulate me or approach me and it felt like I was just a stranger to them however my grandparents were there and scolded my parents for being so blatantly obvious about their favoritism I don’t know what my grandfather told them but my dad later approached me awkwardly and congratulated me later I

found out that I was accepted into a good college with a full scholarship I was so happy about it because I was dreading asking my parents for any financial help I informed my grandparents about this and they offered to take me out to a nice restaurant for dinner after dinner my grandmother posted pictures of me on her Facebook account writing a long caption about how proud she was of me for being such an exceptional student our relative soon found out about it and they chimed and congratulating me I guess some of them

might have reached out to my parents who had no idea about all this instead of feeling happy about it my mother mother called to tell me the next day that Vicki had locked herself in her room crying because she had not been accepted yet by any college and that I was knowingly trying to make my sister feel bad about her grades by talking to all our relatives she told me how this was all my fault because Vicki was apparently depressed after the CPS incident and I had pushed her into bad grades I was so unbelievably heartbroken

that my own mother could blame me for such a thing that it was the last time I ever talked with her for a very long time my grandparents helped me move into my college dorm due to my high school boyfriend’s College being far away from me we had broken up I went into college single and ready to embrace the next chapter of my life with Newfound Independence and determination the breakup had been difficult but I was excited to meet new people this is where I met Rob he and I were both freshmen and we both spent half of our days in

the library Rob was unlike anyone I had ever met before his quiet demeanor and studious nature mirrored my own and we quickly found common ground in our shared love for Academia as the weeks turned into months our friendship blossomed into something deeper and I realized that I had developed feelings for Rob that went beyond mere friendship being an extrovert I was quite upfront about my feelings for Rob and I was surprised to know that he felt the same way we started going out and have been going 8 years strong my grandparents

have met Rob and they absolutely adore him I have met Rob’s parents who literally treat me like their own daughter on occasions Rob’s mother has even confessed to me how she had always wanted a daughter so she is glad that Rob met a wonderful person like me to be honest this is the first time I’ve been surrounded by family members who like me and don’t actually resent me I have told Rob stories of my childhood growing up and he listens to me with empathy and understanding throughout these last 8 years my parents

have hardly contacted me except to send me an occasional birthday text if they remembered but that is it recently Rob and I got engaged he proposed to me while we were trekking to our unusual spot to watch the sunrise and it was a dreamy proposal it was so sweet how nervous he was to pop the question to me and I had no doubts in my mind when I accepted the proposal I posted pictures of my engagement on my Instagram and also informed my grandparents about this they were so happy for me and congratulated us on our future I guess

the news must have spread because my parents called me out of the blue to congratulate me as well I thought it was just a casual conversation since we had not talked for years they asked me about my life my job and my apartment before my dad asked straightforwardly if he could walk me down the aisle I was taken aback by a sudden question since just a few moments ago he didn’t even have an idea about which company I worked in I told him that I had not thought about it yet and my dad told me how it would be embarrassing if I didn’t ask him and

others would question us about it so it’s better if he walked me down the aisle I scoffed and told my parents that I didn’t even know if I was going to be inviting them to my wedding since we had not been in contact but this pissed my parents my mother started to tell me how disappointed she was by my response emphasizing the importance of family and tradition she went on to tell me how they would always be my parents no matter what and that I should let bygones be bygones part of me was tempted to listen to my parents and

accept my Dad’s offer because I did want our relationship to be mended but Another Part Of Me hesitated weary of opening myself up to potential disappointment and hurt again however I was going to be entering a new chapter of my life in a few months so I told my dad that he could walk me down the aisle and he seemed overjoyed now during the wedding planning I reached out to my high school girlfriends who I had always stayed in touch with despite the physical distance that had grown between us due to our careers I told them how I

wanted the gang back together and that I wanted them to be my bridesmaids there were a lot of happy tears and congratulations and without hesitation they accepted my invitation to be part of my bridal party embracing the opportunity to reunite and celebrate this milestone in our lives together we all planned to go to Vegas to celebrate my bachelorette party while Rob had a separate bachelorette party with his friends as well my friends and I posted a bunch of pictures from the party and overall everyone had a lot of fun

however when I came back home my parents called me to let me know how disappointed they were that I had not invited Vicki to be a part of the celebration I told them that there was no way that I would have involved Vicki in my bachelorette party and that I didn’t want her to be a part of my life this took my parents by surprise and they asked me what I meant so I clarified that Vicki’s actions particularly her history of Deceit and betrayal had left me deeply wounded and mistrustful of her intentions I couldn’t

fathom inviting her to such an intimate and joyous occasion as my bachelorette party knowing that her presence would only cast a Shadow over the festivities I also informed my parents that this was also why she was not invited to my wedding hearing this my parents lost it they went off about how I had no right to exclude my sister from my wedding and how it was my duty as her sister to include her in such important events they told me that Vicki had been looking forward to meeting me after she found out that I was getting married I was

confused and I asked my parents what gave her that idea since we had not even talked to each other for such a very long time but my parents brushed my concern aside saying this is not how sisters behaved with each other I understand where you’re coming from from I told them but you have to understand that my relationship with Vicki is complicated after everything that’s happened I just don’t feel comfortable having her be a part of my wedding she has not even once apologized to me for everything she put me through however my

parents as usual ignored my words my mother kept saying how she wanted what was best for the family and that inviting Vicki wasn’t a big deal anyway my dad insisted that our relatives would talk about why my sister wasn’t invited and this would cast a negative light on my wedding however I knew better than to yield to their demands so I did not relent to them I told them that I was okay with people talking behind my back and questioning my character as long as I was surrounded by people I liked and trusted during my wedding my mother then

asked if my fiance would be okay with this and went on to tell me how my in-laws were going to judge me for being so unbelievably cruel as to exclude my own sister from my wedding I laughed and informed my parents that my fiance and in-laws knew about my family Dynamics and none of them would even care if Vicki was present or not they urged me to reconsider emphasizing the importance of family unity and forgiveness but I remained steadfast in my resolve unwilling to compromise my own sense of well-being for the sake of appeasing

others in the end we agreed to disagree each of us holding on to our own perspectives and my parents told me how they needed to think things over and we ended our conversation there I did inform my grandparents about this as I felt a bit guilty for standing up to my parents and they completely have my back my grandparents told me that I should not force myself to invite anyone I didn’t want there and that my parents were as usual trying to guiltrip me since this conversation I’ve been feeling a bit better about my decision

and got distracted with my wedding planning since my wedding is fast approaching last week my dad called me to let me know that he had thought long and hard and that he and Mom would no longer be attending the wedding before I could even react he went on to say that this also meant that he would not be walking me down the aisle I asked him if there was a specific reason why and he informed me that Vicki was going to be moving to a new place soon which my parents had helped her find and since I was going to be excluding her from the

wedding she had decided to host a housewarming party that same day so they would be attending that instead of my wedding I felt a mix of shock and disbelief wash over me as I processed my father’s words the realization that my own sister’s house party took precedence over my wedding was a bitter pill to swallow exacerbating the sense of hurt and betrayal that I had always felt for years I simply told him that I understood and I hung up the call although I tried to act Brave in front of my dad deep down the pain of

rejection cut deeper than words could express when I informed Rob he was Furious about how insensitive my parents could be after they were the ones who had insisted on being invited he was the one who gave me the idea that I should ask my grandfather since he and his grandmother were basically there in my life more than my parents I agreed so I called up my grandparents and asked them if they would be willing to walk me down the aisle at my wedding tears welled up in my eyes as I spoke overcome with emotion at the thought of how much they

meant to me you and Grandpa have always been there for me I said my voice choked with emotion you’ve been more than just grandparents to me you’ve been like parents and I can’t imagine anyone else I’d rather have by my side on my wedding day my grandparents didn’t even hesitate before saying yes they told me how honored they would be to walk me down the aisle and unlike my parents they would not disappoint me their words reassured me and in that moment I felt a profound sense of peace and contentment wash over me with my grandparents by my

side I knew that I had a family who loved me unconditionally and accepted me for who I was flaws and all I also talked to my in-laws about this and Rob’s parents assured me that they did not care if my parents didn’t attend and that regardless of their attendance they were delighted to witness and support our Union my wedding is in 2 days and today I woke up to several missed calls from my dad I called him back thinking it was an emergency and when he picked up he asked me if it was true that my grandparents were walking me down the

aisle I told him yes that was true and then my dad went off about how disrespectful this was to have asked my grandparents I reminded him how he was the one who had declined to come to my wedding so I didn’t see why he was so upset my dad went on to yell at me about how he and Mom were just trying to make me see the wrong of my ways and that they thought that by declining the invitation it would teach me a lesson he went on to say how it was he and mom who had raised me and paid for my food and education so my grandparents had no

right to replace him I tried to reason with him explaining that my grandparents had been there for me in ways he and mom never were but he wouldn’t listen he also told me how I had done nothing but Al at everyone for me and this was all my fault since this conversation I’ve have been wondering if I really did something wrong here Ida for asking my grandparents to walk me down the aisle update one wow I did not expect so many people would comment on my post I have seen a lot of advice and suggestions on how I should approach this situation I

do agree that I need to cut off my parents permanently because their constant back and forth is exhausting and is starting to affect my mental health I don’t want them in my life when they have consistently shown me that Vicki is always their first priority my parents are indeed selfish and I have no known that for a long time however how can a child just stop loving his older parents it’s a much easier thing to say but it’s very difficult to actually do it however for my mental peace I have no choice but to do this so I can enjoy my

wedding tomorrow update two sorry for the lack of update this past month but I have been quite busy since my wedding first of all yes my wedding went quite well with my grandparents by my side as I walked down the aisle despite the absence of my parents I felt a deep sense of joy as I exchanged vows with Rob committing to spend the rest of our lives together my girlfriends and I dance the night away and I can’t begin to describe how important it is to stay in touch with your childhood friends no matter what because sometimes they are

your chosen family during the reception I did feel a twinge of sadness at the realization that my parents were not there to share in this special moment especially as I watched Rob’s parents and cousins giving speeches to him however I took solace in the knowledge that I had made the right decision for myself prioritizing my own well-being and happiness some of my girlfriends did give speeches sharing memories of our experiences and the bond that had carried us through both good times and bad in the days following the wedding

Rob and I went for our honeymoon which his parents had paid for as a wedding gift I spent all my days just lazing around and enjoying myself with my husband I feel so giddy every time I look at Rob and realize that he is married to me now as I had mentioned earlier I did cut off my parents by blocking them from everywhere I didn’t bother sending them an explanation because very frankly they don’t even deserve one I have no idea whether Vicki actually had a house Waring the day or it was just an excuse for my parents to

not attend my wedding but at this point I don’t care I wish nothing but the the best of them and their beloved daughter update three so I was not going to update anything further since my last update but something just unexpected happened and I thought y’all deserve to know I haven’t checked my email in the past month because I was busy with my wedding and honeymoon but today as I was sorting through the emails I found an email from Vicki I don’t even know how she found out my email address and I was completely taken aback I hesitated over

whether to open her mail or simply delete it unread but curiosity got the better of me so I clicked on the email inside was a lengthy message from Vicki expressing her regret over our strained relationship and her desire to reconcile she acknowledged the mistakes she had made in the past admitting that she had been selfish and immature Vicki apologized for the pain she had caused me over the years and expressed a genuine desire to make amends she went on to write how she feels happy for me now that I am married and that she

wishes me nothing but the best she ended the male pleading that I should not punish my parents by cutting them off and that they missed me reading her words I felt a mix of emotions surprise and skepticism part of me wants to believe that Vicki has truly changed that she is sincere in her apology and willing to work towards repairing our relationship but Another Part Of Me remains guarded because this seems too good to be true however regardless of what she has written I know for sure my parents don’t miss me because if they

had they would not have treated me this way all these years I thought about sending a reply back to her but then I decided against it after all forgiveness isn’t something to be rushed it is a process that requires time and reflection and while I am not sure if I am ready to forgive Vicki I don’t want to completely burn the bridge either since she is the one who has apologized to me for her actions to be be honest after my marriage I no longer feel alone I have learned to recognize that I have my loving husband by my side supportive

friends and the unwavering love of my grandparents and with their support I know that I can navigate whatever challenges lay ahead without ever needing Vicki or my parents in my life I have also looked into it and have found a good therapist with whom I have booked my first appointment I have taken this step so I can address and resolve any wounds from my past and heal from them